Brokeback Mountain

This morning I lay in bed calculating all the different possibilities my remaining fifty-six lempiras ($2.88) presented:

Two Butterfingers and six mangos 
One Butterfinger and twenty-two mangos 
No Butterfinger and thirty-seven mangos 
One Butterfinger, one slice of banana bread and sixteen mangos... 

The first thing I’m going to do when I get back to the United States is to clean off my laptop screen.

The second thing I’m going to do is to buy a boatload of Butterfinger candy bars.

And the third thing I’m going to do is regret that decision.